Author’s Note: In many ways, my birthday post to my lifelong friend Carrie was the genesis for the blog section I now call “Find the Five.” And for those that don’t know, “the five” came from something my dad often reminded me of — we are truly blessed when we can count on one hand five people who will be there no matter what and who know us perhaps better than we know ourselves. I imagine there is no real time or space that can make her less real a part of my life. This post was not meant to be a celebration of her nor the post I would write if that were my intent.
My original birthday post is copied below.
That said, one thing I love about Carrie is how much beauty she sees in the world around her and how much she loves Seattle. I thought of this today as I perused her posts about Joe and his surgeries and wanted to do what I could to try and lift their spirits — and sometimes, you actually have the tool to do so. So I took it to the clouds…
Joe, Carrie, Max, Molly — my prayers are with you always.
My video for Joe, Carrie, and M&M:
ORIGINAL BIRTHDAY BLOG POST from Facebook, June 7, 2015:
I am not much for Facebook these days and truthfully, avoid the whole obligatory “HBD” type message – even though I’m pretty judicious about who I call a friend these days and most all deserve some acknowledgement of their important day.
That said, I couldn’t let your birthday pass without the recognition it deserves. Because on this day, this sweet wonderful day in June four score and seven yea…rs ago (I have no idea how long that really is, but it sounded epic and you, my friend, are epic), you, my dearest sweetest bitchiest-when-necessary Carrie, were born.
You are my friend of a lifetime. If elements of you were signs in some astrological map of the assuredly luxurious yet effortlessly low-key Jason-Carrie Solar System (known by modern scientists as Odwalla) and these symbols represented everything I can remember of our storied history, the part we’ve missed in the middle, and the best I can hope for your future, the horoscope would be comprised as follows:
•Steadfast Cheerleader (most days, somewhat more so on drizzly ones): grey skies don’t have this girl down, you get up and go with nothing but possibility and potential ahead and true belief in your own strength to get you through whatever life may throw at you.
•Co-Conspirator (mostly in the evening, whenever if prompted which requires the faintest pressure applied when arm-twisting): adventure finds you but not just through thrills and excitement, but also in making the old or familiar fresh and fun again, in finding capriciousness in the mundane, and of course, being the ever faithful accomplice for ████████████, ██████ when ██ was ████████, ████████████ – the ███████ years, etc. etc. etc. (specifics redacted due to pending expiration of several statutes of limitation).
•Finder-of-beauty-in-the-simple-and-simplicity-in-the-complex Observer (often enough to be noticeable by most): you have the uncanny ability to see then convey to others what they cannot see themselves but then becomes plainly obvious to them after. You teach without pedantics by showing how the world around us can be truly seen.
•Best-version-of-Yourself Mother and Wife (always): You have found the best version of yourself through the transformation first to spouse and then to mother and have embraced the generous amount of imperfection allowed when you forgive yourself so you can move on in support of the future of your family. It keeps you growing in ways never before possible.
This is just some of what you represent to me and just a few of the reasons that neither time (my/our real/imaginary issue) nor space (definitely NOT an issue) matter as much in this friendship of ours. You have known me for nearly two decades…all of it…even though we don’t see each other or talk on the phone. You exist in this special “category” of people in my life who transcend nearly everything distracting about life because they are woven so tightly in to the fabric of my own.
So here’s what – you, me, Joe, the kids – ASAP. It’s time to end the drought here.
I’ve learned a lot over the past years about not waiting to tell people in your life how much you care…and this year I learned a very important lesson about completing the sentence about why you do. So, instead of just saying “I love you…” you fill in the blanks behind it and take the few seconds to tell the person why. This took more than a few seconds but if it brings even a smile to your face it was worth it. Because this is the why behind my next statement. I love you.